Father

This is a bit delayed but thought I'd post some of what my wiser half sent me on Father's day. For daughters only though!

"Any man can be a father, but it takes a special person to be a dad"

There's something like a line of gold thread running through a man's words when he talks to his daughter, and gradually over the years it gets to be long enough for you to pick up in your hands and weave into a cloth that feels like love itself.

"The father of a daughter is nothing but a high-class hostage. A father turns a stony face to his sons, berates them, shakes his antlers, paws the ground, snorts, runs them off into the underbrush, but when his daughter puts her arm over his shoulder and says, 'Daddy, I need to ask you something,' he is a pat of butter in a hot frying pan."

Someday I may find my Prince Charming, but my daddy will always be my king.

Mum about M.U.M

I know I'm onto something big here. It's that feeling you get when you find the starting point of a thread that can only lead to a saga of epic proportions, a magnum opus of a discovery, an invention, a life changing moment...

Now, I may be revealing a deep dark brotherhood kind of secret which everyone in the know, is aware of but is terrified to talk about. Then again, it may be something that is so obvious that I am an idiot for ever questioning the act. In the former case, I'm sorry guys!

If you are not male, and are in the reading throes of this epiphany, bully for you! You go girl! If you are male, and yet have never encountered the phenomenon about to be revealed, please read the sign carefully, the next time.

Okay, no more dilly dallying. Let's get to the brunt of it. To brass tacks as they say. Tally ho and all that!

WHY DO MEN SPIT INTO URINALS???????????

And, just out of curiousity, why are men mum about this and go about life as if it never happens?

Hmmm.....

The nascent notion of Men's Urinal Mystery (MUM) initially began it's life traipsing merrily in my head along with millions of other thoughts all jostling for prime time brain space,but as the mystery deepened -- 'BAM'...it was the top priority.

At first, in my usual unbiased way, I thought it was only us Indians. Then, lo and behold, I saw a Caucasian do it in the US, a Filipino in the Philippines, and that's when the mystery manifested itself to me in its full glory.

By the way, I have no answers here, so if you want to keep reading and expecting one, sorry. However, there are numerous hypotheses proposed here and I would like to get a feel for which one is the most sound, and if a new idea should present itself to you (as you ponder this creme de la creme du nature mystique), go for it!

Okay, here are my suppositions in absolutely no particular order.

• We would like to encourage all possible participants to shed out some fluid during the act
• There's the glob of saliva that is actually being saved for this special occasion
• We feel extremely disgusted with something down there, either personal or urinal
  
• It's an involuntary impulse and the act just doesn't seem complete without that 'and take that' finale
• Actually, the one above was my last idea

If someone has the answer or an 'Aha' moment they can provide me, please do so. I can't sleep, eat or drink unless I resolve this once and for all and lay to rest this cropper of a mystery. Then, not wanting to rest on our laurels, we shall delve into the various spitting styles that will allow us to further explore the inner workings of the human mind. See, I told you this was ground-breaking stuff...

DISCLAIMERS

• No urinals were hurt during the making of this article
• I claim no knowledge of French, so whatever is in here, is whatever is in here

Competition: The double-edged sword

After a long hiatus, I am back to my writing ways, at least to post a few thoughts and experiences in the recent past.

A few weeks back, the girls started their skating lessons. As is to be expected, there was the usual stumbling process, literally. They seemed to get a hang of it after a few sessions, no Katarina Witts, but at least looked comfortable walking around on wheels. In due course, it was evident that Manasi was the faster learner and this prompted the instructor to split up the stuck-like-glue girls. Of course, Manasi didn't see this as a reward, but as a punishment, being separated from her sister. She created quite the scene, crying and protesting the unfair divide.

The next class, my girl got really smart, but not in a way we wanted. She started skating slow and kept pace with her sister just so they won't be separated!

As a parent, it's a very tough situation. While we are obviously happy about the bond they share, it's sad to see our babies perform less than their best just so the other can keep up. That's what seems to happen a lot nowadays. When one cannot do well somewhere, the other slows down automatically. It's too early to tell them that each one needs to do their best in everything one does and not everyone can do well in everything.

I'm sure we will encounter more situations like this as they grow up and I only hope they learn to feed off each other's strengths and do the best they can in whatever they do. I don't want them to become less competitive so their achievements are always cumulative but individually mediocre. We'll see...